Yet each man kills the thing he loves,
By each let this be heard,
Some do it with a bitter look,
Some with a flattering word,
The koward does it with a kiss,
The brave man with a sword!"
                     oscar wilde , the ballad of reading gaol

When was the last that I thought of you...I know not...but am I the one who goes alone on this path...and should I but care only a little for the souls that follow or those as march ahead?

Mode C is a way of life, perhaps my way of life: C for Cool, C for Cold, C for Chaos, C for Calvin. Ultimately, all of it boils down to the way you look at things. Are they not how they are but just how they appear?? No...and yes...Almost all the seriously critical fundamental concepts of life...aren't they just the bogies under Calvin's bed that he is afraid of? Miss Wormwood, Susie, Mom and Dad, and of course above all, Hobbes...aren't they all merely the means that he uses to attack these bogies?

Reflecting on 'living the Calvin way', I have started to believe that life and our reaction to it can only be explained by a number of Calvin and Hobbes strips combined together. The philosophy, as I like to call it, is to know that you are not alone. It is not just my perspective alone that is going to help me fight my bogies. I will be able to inch towards the Calvin way only when I perceive the other perspectives on my way.

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Wednesday, July 06, 2005
It's ok but why?

I wanted to go, too...I so badly did! (okay, you wanted to go, so what...did you tell anybody about it?)

Why didn't I go then? (they never even asked me)

They might have thought that if I were interested, I would contact them (why not, I love being the unwanted guest)

But...perhaps they did not have enough space (but didn't someone say they had space for one more person?)

They might not have found me online or on messenger (they had my phone number, na?)

Oh come on, the plan was made in such a you expect them to wait for eternity and call the entire batch up to ask them if they wanted to go? (hmm...that sounds reasonable. After all, I take so much time to get ready that they would have had to spend another day waiting for me to get up and going)

They might have thought that I will be busy with classes (yeah, considering the whole second year has no classes, that is a realistic probability)

They might have thought that I will be busy with Konnect or Backwaters (oh yes, I can not live without Konnect or Backwaters, they are my sweethearts you know!)

They might have forgotten that I exist (ah well...ummm...but they, of all people?)

They might have remembered what I am capable of, when unleashed (if it's that, which I think/hope/pray/wish it is not, well...I have nothing more to say about it)

There might be a substantial reason for it that I can not think of and anyway, why the hell did I expect anything from anyone? (I know but I feel so hurt...but then, this, too shall pass :-))

And yeah, I just remembered...didn't I say myself that I did not want to go to any more trips? (yes I did :-(( )

Posted at 03:38 pm by Nitai

July 6, 2005   08:03 PM PDT
July 6, 2005   09:04 PM PDT
some things in life remain great enigmas..
i share your feelings on this one..

Why, oh Why?

chal koi baat nahi, koi movie dekhte hain.
July 9, 2005   02:22 AM PDT
BABA... sometimes u have to let people know wat you want ratehr than wait.. hey i cud say.. y didnt u ask me for DUS huh !!!! chalo enjoy life and leave ur sweethearts (Konnect and BW) alone for a while...
July 9, 2005   02:26 AM PDT
You don't understand the context can not. Dus is different but I can't tell you why.

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