Yet each man kills the thing he loves,
By each let this be heard,
Some do it with a bitter look,
Some with a flattering word,
The koward does it with a kiss,
The brave man with a sword!"
                     oscar wilde , the ballad of reading gaol

When was the last that I thought of you...I know not...but am I the one who goes alone on this path...and should I but care only a little for the souls that follow or those as march ahead?

Mode C is a way of life, perhaps my way of life: C for Cool, C for Cold, C for Chaos, C for Calvin. Ultimately, all of it boils down to the way you look at things. Are they not how they are but just how they appear?? No...and yes...Almost all the seriously critical fundamental concepts of life...aren't they just the bogies under Calvin's bed that he is afraid of? Miss Wormwood, Susie, Mom and Dad, and of course above all, Hobbes...aren't they all merely the means that he uses to attack these bogies?

Reflecting on 'living the Calvin way', I have started to believe that life and our reaction to it can only be explained by a number of Calvin and Hobbes strips combined together. The philosophy, as I like to call it, is to know that you are not alone. It is not just my perspective alone that is going to help me fight my bogies. I will be able to inch towards the Calvin way only when I perceive the other perspectives on my way.

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Main Hoon Na

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Stay Hungry Stay Foolish
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Saturday, December 25, 2004

My trip to Patna is over and I have been in Buxar since yesterday. There are already quite a lot of relatives at home and more are expected in a day or two. The occasion is the annual 24-hour Harikirtan organised every year on the 26th and 27th of December to remember my Great Grand father who passed away on the same date many years ago. It has become a tradition for the family. Still, however much may it be a part of the routine, every year's Harikirtan brings with itself a new flavor, a new form in which the family dynamics plays its role.

Right from my Bare Papa to the youngest member of our family, Bharat Bhaiya's (my first cousin) daughter, it has become a custom of sorts for everyone to be present on this occasion. We may think of absenting ourselves from any festival but not from this one unless there is a very strong reason. Unfortunately for me, I had such a reason last year due to which I had to give the Kirtan a miss. This year, however, the Kirtan is going to be special. It is also going to purify the new house that Chote Papa has built in Buxar. I have just been to the new house and I must say that by Buxar standards, the house has come out quite well. I hope that the Kirtan, that is actually going to shift its venue for the first time in my memory, proves auspicious for the new house.

It is only because of the Kirtan that all of my cousins have been able to keep so much in touch. We are not just on Hi-hello terms but are actually into each others' lives fully, living the others' joys and sorrows alike. There has never been any distinction between brothers/sisters and cousins in our family and God willing, it shall never ever happen.

It is not that our family is perfect and does not have the usual skirmishes that any family faces. But, with the trend moving from the joint to the nuclear families, I must say that our family puts up a brave face despite everything. It is time now that I play my part in this tradition that my Grand father has set up for us. With Bharat Bhaiya's daughter making her first entry in the Kirtan this year, I am no longer a part of the family's youngest generation. Going on 25 this June, it is about time that I, along with my cousins, take hold of the family tradition and take it least, that was what quite a lot of the talk this year was all about...Gosh!!! Am I really ready for it?

Posted at 06:32 pm by Nitai

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